12 – Reconnecting with Truth

To disconnect from the Truth is painful, and so a myriad of coping mechanisms occur to soothe the pain. Perhaps you drink too much, watch pornography, eat too much, watch too much TV, consume too much alcohol or take drugs, or maybe you just hate being alone with yourself so you need to be around people all the time. Whatever your coping mechanisms are, they will never heal the pain of being disconnected from the Truth. They only serve to further hide or disguise the real source of your pain. 

A friend of mine who has struggled with addiction throughout his life shared a principle with me that he learn during his participation in the popular 12-Step program, a program that has made some positive difference for many people despite some significant half-truths in its design that can cause some negative impacts for its participants.  He told me, “Getting off the drug is only 5% of the work that needs to be done.  The other 95% is dealing with what comes up for you now that you can no longer use your drug to escape.”  

What you have to deal with when you stop using your coping mechanisms  are the lies you have told yourself and believed.  Perhaps you would have to deal with a deep unconscious belief that you are unwanted or unlovable.  Perhaps you believe that you are broken or damaged.  Maybe you believe you have been abandoned.  

All of these lies, if you believe them and think they are set in stone, will certainly cause you to want to escape them, but what if, instead of using coping mechanisms, you learned to transmute these feelings and ideas into something Truer and higher?  Why not learn to truly heal instead of continuing to cope?  What would be possible for you if you knew how to do this?  What if you could really unlock your power by discovering the Truth about who you really are?  What if you could actually believe, with everything you are, that you are wanted and loved? Or that you are perfect and whole?  What if you could experience and know that you are never alone and that life is trying to give you everything you need and desire because life is actually wonderful?  What would your life be like then?  What could you achieve?  

If we were to boil it all down, the thing we most don’t want to see or accept is that we are the source of this pain. We are the ones who disconnect ourselves from the Truth. Nothing outside of ourselves can do this to us because to disconnect from the Truth or to remain connected to it is 100% a matter of free will. Even if this disconnect happened when we were 4 years-old, and unaware of what we were doing at the time, we were still the ones who believed the lies and so we have the ability to tell the truth to ourselves now.  This is great news because it means that you have 100% control over whether or not you will reconnect yourself to the greatest power in the universe so that you may use this power to create the best version of yourself and your life. 

If you wish to align yourself with Truth, you may want to consider the power of courage.  It has been said many times that courage is not the absence of fear, rather, it is the presence of fear and the choice to act anyway.  Courage is the moment you choose to act in a way that is inconsistent with your fears.  It is a declaration you make to all of life that says, “I am unwilling to let this fear choose my thoughts and actions.  I am in control of my own choices.” 

Making a courageous choice causes a significant shift in the polarity of your motivations in that it causes you to shift  from making a choice from fear to making a choice from love.  Instead of honoring the false identity’s need to survive, you begin honoring your True Self’s desire to expand. In this way, courage is powerful.  You may not always make the courageous choice, but it is always your choice to make.

The more you confront your fears and overcome them, the less courage will be required over time.  Your feelings about yourself will change.  You will have more natural confidence and ease in situations that used to scare you.  The moment you act with courage is powerful because you are shifting your sense of who you are, from someone who is smaller than the circumstances to someone who is bigger than the circumstances.  When you take a courageous action, an old identity dies and a new one is born.  

For example, if you are afraid of singing on stage and so you never do it, a part of you identifies with this fear.  You may think of yourself as someone who can’t sing on stage.  Then, in the moment when you finally do sing on stage, this identity called ‘person who can’t sing on stage’ dies.  You can no longer continue to believe that you can’t sing on stage.  Why?  Because you just did it.

Because of this, a new identity is created, even if it is done at an unconscious level. Your new sense of identity may not be ‘person who easily sings on stage.’ because maybe you can’t believe this yet.  You may still have fears, sensations and anxieties about it.  However, your new identity could be something like ‘person who is nervous singing on stage’ which is still an improvement.  Then, as you continue to sing on stage more and more, the nervousness disappears and a new self-image is formed.

If you have followed everything so far, you should plainly see that every time you act with courage, you are creating a new version of yourself.  You are creating a new identity that is more consistent with the Truth of who you are.  If this is not clear to you, I suggest you go back and reread this post until you get it.  You will need to understand the power of courage if you want to truly unlock your power and potential. 

If you want to be the best version of yourself, you will need to confront the death of your current false identities over and over again until there is nothing left but the True Self – who you really are.  

Remember the notion that enlightenment is a destructive process.  What is being destroyed is “you”… but not the real “You.”  The real You can never be destroyed.  The real You is always present even when you are holding onto lies about yourself, others and life. 

The moment you accept a falsehood, you become “dual” in nature.  You will now have a perspective that is false, along with an inner knowing that is True.  Now, the false part of ‘you’ must continue to lie to maintain dominance over the True part of you, but it is a lot of work, and will make you tired and sick over time.  By acknowledging a falsehood as a falsehood, you begin telling the Truth again, which makes you whole again (or non-dual in nature).  Telling the truth where you have been lying brings you back into awareness of the real You. 

To go back to our example, if you cheated on your partner and hid it from them, you stopped telling the truth.  What you were saying and what actually happened became two different things. Now, there is what you are saying is true and what is actually true, and they are not the same.  

The moment you admit to your partner that you cheated on them, you are telling the truth again, and because of this, what you are saying is true and what actually happened in reality, are one and the same again.  Even though there may be some consequences to deal with now that you’ve told the truth, You as a person will be whole again and no longer living in this duality.

Given all that has been said here, do not underestimate the power of incorporating the following statements into your speaking:

I was wrong.

I lied.

I was incorrect.

I wasn’t honest.

I wasn’t taking responsibility.

I didn’t do what I said I would do.

I did what I said I wouldn’t do.

To admit our own falsehoods is the first step in a new commitment to telling the Truth.  While it may take courage and you may find yourself repeating the same mistakes sometimes,  it is always valuable to get yourself back on track with the Truth.  Even though it may be challenging, it will always be worth it in the end.

Again, you may have to deal with some consequences, depending on the degree of the falsehood, but you will also know you are going in the right direction now.  The lies we tell may seem easier in the moment but they make life much harder in the long run.  Telling the Truth may seem harder in the moment but it is much easier in the long run.  

Whenever you are believing that you can’t do it or that you are a victim or that you don’t deserve your deepest desires, you are believing lies.  Understanding that these beliefs and feelings are not the Truth is the first step.  Then, you must do the work to believe thoughts and take actions that are closer to the Truth… that you can do it, that you are at cause and you do deserve all that you desire.  Be willing to live in the Truth of who you really are by confronting who you are not, and you will discover an increasing power and ability to create the life you really desire.